xurnami: (darash)
Recently, I've been working on trying to figure out how to expand my social circle. Due to events of the last year, my social circle has collapsed significantly. I reacted to certain badness by becoming more insular and removing myself from a number of spaces that I used to inhabit.

I have a good sized social circle now, even if I am still experiencing some social anxiety about actually getting together with them. I would like to get to know more people but there are a couple of difficulties I'm experiencing about the directions I am trying to head out in.

I spend a large portion of my time and energy working at being a better programmer. A large amount of the news and other things that I consume are in some way related to this particular goal. I get off my job programming to proceed to do additional programming off the clock for my own projects.

I would very much enjoy being able to spend more time talking and working with people with interests along these lines. However, a vast majority of the spaces for discussing these topics are well known cesspools where people are harassed for being out of line of the "normal" cis white male. While I can present as such, it is getting increasingly uncomfortable for me to do so. Furry conventions have had codes of conduct as long as I can remember, there are still tech conferences which are arguing if they should have them or not. This makes me extremely uncomfortable about attending many of these events. There also appears to be an extinction burst going on in the community around these behaviors which is not the best to be involved in either.

If people know if spaces where this is less of a problem, I would be quite interested to learn about them. Virtual or real space would both be great for me.

Beyond that group, the other group I'd like to get more involved in involves content creators of different strokes, especially among transformation content. I am feeling awkward around approaching these people into more social interactions as I've been mostly in the position of commissioner to content creator. The content I create is most often not along the lines of tech which is awkward to even bring up, I feel, among these other content creation groups.

I have some plans over the next week to build a website for storing my commissions along with some microfiction to go along with them to show some other forms of creativity. I have some skill at fiction writing but it is not a skill which I have spent as much time working on. I am very appreciative of these artists who have practiced thier art and understand the amount of time and energy they have to put in to become good at these things. This is why I spend quite a bit of money commissioning these people to create art. However, I have no clue how to move beyond being a large pocketbook either.

If anyone has done such things and has any advice, I'd be very interested to hear about that.

September 2015

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